Believe it or not

This has been passed down my family tree:

"Believe only half of what you see and nothing of what you hear".

Apparently this can be traced back as far as Alfred in the 1300's.
And is still true today.
I don't think my family tree goes back to Alfred, in case you were wondering. But it must go back to the 1300's - unless we were suddenly begat out of thin air.

Back to the advice. So good I'll repeat it:

"Believe only half of what you see and nothing of what you hear".

A famous poet also wrote this advice to a young man:
"You are younger yet ... but the time will arrive when you will learn to judge for yourself.... Believe nothing you hear, and only one half that you see."

He also wrote something along the following lines (in a poem):

For the moon never beams, without bringing me dreams
Of the wonderful Stevie G.
And the stars never rise, but I feel the bright eyes
Of the wonderful Stevie G.

What insight! What a poet!

Porridge and 13 days

13 days is a long time -if you're waiting for something important to happen,
and it's far too short if you're on holiday.
I've just seen bits of the film '13 days',
All about the 1962 Cuban missile crisis.
Don't know how much of the film is true to what really happened.
But, it seems that we (the world) were jolly close to being blown apart.
(I wonder how close we are now.)
Our veneer of civilization generally seems to be pretty thin.
It doesn't take much to disrupt our families, communities, cities, economy, weather systems, etc etc. In fact, I don't think, deep down, we're very civilized at all.
Kind of makes you wonder how come we've survived fort so long.
In my case - I think I survive because I eat porridge every Saturday morning.

Clear Conscience

The sun's out bright this morning -good
The football team lost night - not good.
But in the whole scheme of things, I guess the sun coming up is much more important.

Old friends are good too. Old in the sense that you've known them for ages. I'm not saying you personally are old by the way! And if I was, nothing wrong with being old anyway.
I have a stone I picked up on a beach somewhere, when I was a slip of a lad..... now that is old, the stone, like about millions of years old. So in the whole (and different) scheme of things, someone who is not even 45 is definitely not old.

Question. Do you sometimes wonder if you should be reading this blog?
Whoever you are, I don't have a problem (with you reading it; I have other problems).
But I was reading a blog last night and thought, "I wonder if they mind?". When I was rocking them in their pram nearly 20 years ago, blogs were not even a concept the world's best futuroligist would have come up with. Now I'm reading their blog. Weird. Then I wondered some more, and thought "they wouldn't write this stuff down if they minded". So I read on, and then slept with a clear conscience.

World Premiere
Tonight I heard one
Composed especially
for the Norfolk County Youth Orchestra
It was cool
It was about Nelson
The Sea Admiral
Not the hotel near the railway station
in Norwich
And it was about Victory
And Boats
And the Sea
The composer was at the World Premiere
He was cool too
With a lot of hair
And expansive hand and arm gestures.
Paul Lewis
That was his name
We spotted him well before
he took his bow
Can you spot him
in this picture
Thanks Paul

Lost
A useful word, used in many different contexts. Like:
I lost the will to live having read my previous blog - far too long.
I lost a load of money - at the racecourse.
I lost my first tooth - when I was eight.
I lost over half a stone - by not drinking beer for a week.
I lost my virginity - when I was blah blah blah.
I lost my Grandfather - I wish I'd known him better.

All these experiences of the word create differing emotions. Like (in a different order):
Patience Pride Satisfaction Anger Grief Relief

I loose things everyday - some never to be found again, but
I really, really hope you find what you've lost today.

The A11
One of the good things about living in Norwich:
There are no motorways into the city.
So it takes a long time to get here.
(Unless you are coming from somewhere close by,
in which case, it doesn't take so long)
There used to be no dual carriageways in Norfolk either.
But gradually we've reluctantly had a few built.
So, not many people come, and certainly nobody just passes through.
That's why it's quiet.
That's why its good.

Surprising then that one of our dual carriageways should be in the news the other day.

With some geezer driving up the wrong way.
And hitting (apparently) four cars.

I've always wondered how people get onto the road to drive the wrong way.

People have probably looked at me, and wondered why I'm going the wrong way too.
Fortunately non of my misadventures have been up a motorway.
Mine tend to involve hammers, drills, lawnmowers.
Or maybe my approach to being a father, friend, colleague or partner.

Next time you see me doing something stupid - do me a favour. Yell.

These thoughts remind me of a joke - the punch line is ' psychopath', just in case you younger readers don't get it.....

A Motorway goes into a pub and shouts:
"OI. I'M A MOTORWAY, SIX LANES, TWO HARD SHOULDERS, AND A CENTRAL RESERVATION. I WANT A BEER, AND I MEAN NOW COS' I'M THAT HARD"
The barman serves him.

Shortly afterwards a Dual Carriageway comes into the pub.
The Motorway shouts,
"OI. WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE, I'M A MOTORWAY AND DEAD HARD, SO WATCH IT"
The Dual carriageway says "it's OK mate I only want a beer, no trouble" and continues with his life.
Then a small piece of red coloured tarmac goes into the bar.
On seeing it, the Motorway stops drinking and runs around to hide behind the Dual Carriageway. "what's up?" asks the Dual Carriageway.
The Motorway says "I'm not here, you haven't seen me. Schtum"
The Dual Carriageway says "you aren't afraid of that little bit of red coloured tarmac are you?"
The Motorway replies:


"It may only be a bit of coloured tarmac to you, but I happen to know that it's a raving cyclepath"

I would - I would not
Ever picked petals off a daisy singing "she loves me, she loves me not"?
No, me neither.
But along similar lines. For the good of humanity :
I would volunteer to taste different cheeses in the supermarket
I would not do it in Tesco.
I would volunteer to exercise and then check out my heart rate
I would not sit in a freezer to see if I catch a cold.
I would drink a bottle of wine and then test my reactions (in a room, not in a car, of course)
I would not, most definitely now, pop a new and untested pill that has been dreamed up to see if it enhances my immune system.

On the other hand, I do like to know that the few pills and medicines I imbibe have been tested somehow - I just don't know what the best way is. I read a book recently where they cloned humans and then used the clones for such things as this. But I don't think I'd advocate that....

Oh yes, the daisy thing - I already know!

This is not a photo blog!
But today, at the beach
I had to snap this.
So Southwold.

Mind you, on the other side.
Diggers and cranes
playing in the sand .
Popping in huge
massive
boulders.
And something they call
Groynes
A right royal mess.
No sand castles or swimming there until July.

Who can identify this?

A Clue: I took it 15 minutes ago.

Other things you might question:
Why I stood to freeze myself standing on a windswept and snowy park in the freezing cold to watch amateur Saturday morning footy.
Why Milosovic suddenly dies in his prison cell.
Why Gerrard did that awful back pass to let Henry score.
Why my cat thinks he'd be better off as a dog.
Why I look older with all my hair cut off.
Why my ears are still ringing after the Delirious concert three days ago.
And finally, why chocolate, red wine and cashew nuts are so much better than sprouts, alcopops and black cherry yogurt.

Southampton
A plus - the University, which I visited yesterday 25 years since I first went.
A minus - the noise and pollution around the docks.
A minus - a hangover I had on February 23rd 1982.
A plus - a place where I met my first wife.
A minus - it's too far from Norwich.

A big plus - the New Forest.
A big minus - I'm scared of horses - but looking at these how can I be.
A big plus - the cup of tea I had yesterday in a Brockenhurst.
The biggest plus - I'm going again soon!

Flying high

I was
On Monday
All the way up
Our lovely east coast
To Edingburgh
And then a minibus to Perth
First trip to Perth


Flying high
On a clear day
Everything looks so peaceful
Below
And pretty
Snow, Hills, Rivers, Beaches

And then you come down
Factories
Smoke
Crumbling walls and fences
Dirt, Litter

Yep, we're all far better from a distance of about 20,000 feet.

Power Steering

I'm far to young to remember driving cars which didn't have power steering - but I'm told you can pick up an old car which is without this little luxury.

And the experience isn't great.

Especially if you're stationary, or going really slow. Really have to work hard to turn the wheel, or the car for that matter.

When you've got moving, it's all a bit easier.

So, as today is Sunday, the lesson to remember, especially if you've got no power steering. You have to be moving in order to change direction. Don't just stand still and expect things to change - you've got to be doing your bit ......

Long Blogs
It is with a dash of dismay that I have to report to my erstwhile blog readers that it has been brought to my attention that the majority of my posts to this blogging phenomena are somewhat on the abbreviated side meaning that probably they believe I have nothing which touches on the interesting or worth reading barometer of opinion so therefore I bring to your attention this most absorbing edition that will no doubt portray a far more accurate picture of my linguistic talent than has hitherto been expressed.
And so, without further ado, I blog:

"Today it was called Thursday.
It was a very cold Thursday in fact.
So much so that my fingers froze to my handlebar.
The End."

N & N

Today I was thinking about N & N

Norfolk & Norwich Hospital
or
Nephews & Nieces

Well, a bit of both.

But mostly the latter

I have 9 of them
7 fair and 2 rough
4 american and 5 english


When I think of them, in no particular order, I think of
"gosh isn't she grown up"
"gosh, still so tiny"
"2nd rate airlines and cuisine"
"how sweet and lovely, could eat her up right now"
"what's her name this year"
"just like her dad"
"baseball, and please explain the rules"
"football, and come on you yellows (don't you dare go red)"
"mad but very, very lovable""

I also think of 5 months time
and what 7 of them all going to bring with them as a gift for me!
(R - not really by the way!)

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